BREAKING: Trump Settles Trump University Lawsuit For $25 Million

BREAKING

President-elect of the United States Donald J. Trump has just paid $25 million to settle a lawsuit brought against him by former students of the now-defunct Trump University!

Er. . .just like he agreed to do after the election. . .last November.  You know, when he won and stuff.

Okay, maybe you can get those presses rolling again.  After all, this isn’t really a juicy piece of gossip (in related news, I paid my electric bill today), but it does mark a significant milestone in Trump’s journey to the White House.  After all, it wouldn’t quite do for a sitting president to have some tawdry lawsuit hanging over his head as he’s trying to conduct the nation’s business.  There’s the whole business of discovery and depositions, where all kinds of things get said and all manner of things come out–and before you know it, you have a real scandal on your hands.  Better to just get it settled and out of the way.

But seriously–and yes, I occasionally do get Serious–none of the above is to make light of the lawsuit itself.  From everything I’ve read, the plaintiffs in this case really did have a valid claim (the instructors seem to have sold the “university” the same way those old 976 numbers sold “beautiful ladies just waiting for your call!”).  Trump lending his name and his imprimatur to that venture seems, in retrospect, either a huge mistake or a huge con, depending on your point of view.  Providing restitution to the people who lost money is not only the best thing for Trump’s presidency, it’s the right thing to do–period.

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Marc Giller

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