Of Nightmares

Walter Shapiro mused in Roll Call today that Liz Cheney could pick the next president. Setting up a string of dominoes to rival Guinness record-holders, he games a scenario with no electoral majority in November and a race thrown to the House.

He then ruminates on the possibility of single-district House members casting their own votes, settling on the #NeverTrump Liz Cheney in Wyoming as a literal king maker.

Liz Cheney’s foreign policy views are as unapologetically hawkish as those of her father. As she puts it on her campaign website, “We need leaders in Washington who understand that the world is safer and that America is more secure when America leads from strength.”

Fair enough. If Shapiro wants to game nightmares, here’s one.

Going into the July Republican national convention in Cleveland, Marco Rubio goes missing–from the agenda, from the Senate, and from anywhere. Nobody can find Marco (which is not uncommon).

Then, after the first ballot, in which nobody gains a majority, Marco dramatically shows up on the floor of the convention and asks his now-unbound delegates to vote for Donald Trump en bloc. Chaos ensues. Many of the Rubio-bound delegates are actually planning to vote for Ted Cruz (many are Cruz supporters) but many are still loyal to Marco.

Donald Himself ascends to the podium, hands on “Liddle Marco’s” shoulders. (“It’s L-I-D-D-L-E. Liddle, Liddle, Liddle Marco.”) And in a display of knife-in-back pageantry fit for Game of Thrones, tells the world that Marco Rubio will join his ticket as Vice President.

It takes another 4 ballots to beat the Cruz crowd into submission, with 45 uses of the gavel, one call to the Sergeant at Arms for order, and threats of locking out Cruz delegates from the convention hall by Speaker Ryan. And on the 5th ballot, the delegates affirm Donald Trump as the nominee for a Trump/Rubio ticket.

Epilogue: Trump’s first action upon winning the White House will be to triple the Secret Service’s presidential protection budget, because the death threats will keep on coming. The rest of us simply pray for Donald’s health (purposely ambiguously).

About the author

Steve Berman

The old Steve cared about money, prestige, and power. Then Christ found me. All at once things changed. But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

I spent 30 years in business. Now I write and edit. But mostly I love. I have a wife and 2 kids and a dog and we live in a little house in central Georgia.

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