*** FILE *** The HOLLYWOOD sign on the hillside overlooking Hollywood, Ca., is shown in this 1981 file photo. The Screen Actors Guild board of directors on Saturday Feb. 21, 2009 rejected the "last, best and final offer" by Hollywood producers for a new contract. (AP Photo, FILE)

Stars Are Moving Away From The Beach Out Of Global Warming Fears

For the longest time Hollywood has been the bastion of meterologists and climate scientists. These distinguished members of he scientific community have often built palatial homes on the beach, but now as their fears of global warming continue to grow, they’re starting to put their money where their mouth is, not by donating to causes or helping develop green technology, but by moving away from the beach.

That’s right – the formerly gauche land side of the Pacific Coast Highway has become more attractive as the stars worry about rising sea levels.

“The whole ‘being on the beach’ thing has started to fade away in Malibu because of global warming and climate change,” said Anthony Paradise, an international agent for Sotheby’s, to the Hollywood Reporter. “Some people will buy on the land side because they’re fearful that ocean-side homes may disappear.”

Celebrities are also discovering that the once undesirable hills above Malibu offer more privacy, but their primary concern is disappearing beaches.

Most important, it features sweeping ocean views without the worries of dry sand slipping away. “From Lady Gaga’s house, you actually feel like you’re on the beach — you can even see people walking on the sand — but you’re not on the beach,” says [real estate executive Santiago] Arana, whose current Malibu Park listing offers a similar sense of beachfront living without the rising sea-level fears: The $13.95 million, ocean-view modern farmhouse sits on more than 4 acres. “It’s got acreage, a tennis court, barn and organic gardens. It’s also gated and extremely private.”

There’s no need to worry, however; even though the stars are giving up their beachside homes and heading for the hills, they’re not letting go of their limousines and private jets, so their anti-technology hypocrisy will remain on full display. After all, some things never change.

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Chris Queen

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