This Blog Could Save Your Life

“These are the times that try men’s souls.” – Thomas Paine and Jesse Kelly. (We don’t know who said it first.)

North Korea has nuclear weapons and if they can figure out how to download the latest iTunes update, they’re going to launch one at Guano or wherever.  One hundred Nazis left the relative safety of their tree houses and invaded 1/8th of the town square at Charlottesville.  Terror in Europe.  Debt spiraling out of control.  Wolf Blitzer is still on television.  I could go on and on.

The point is, these are without question the scariest times in human history if you don’t count any of the plagues or world wars or civil wars or Jimmy Carter.

If you want to survive these times, there is only one thing that will save you: panic.  The worst thing you can do in any survival situation is remain calm and unemotional.  It’s important that you spend every waking moment stressed out about Trump’s next press conference.  How else will you convince your friends (and your children) that they’re about to die?

I’m well versed in panic and how it can help.  My six year old son broke his arm once.  Snapped it like a toothpick.  It was dangling there and everything but I don’t want to tell you too many details and gross you out.  What did I do?  I screamed at the top of my lungs until the ambulance got there.  Is his arm healed today?  You bet it is.

 Do you think I stayed calm and drove my wife to the hospital when she went into labor?  Of course not.  That’s how babies get killed.  I threw her over my shoulder and started running towards the hospital.  If I hadn’t passed out on the side of the road, that ambulance would never have picked us up and who knows if we would have made it.

The point to all this is that I see the outrage and the panic every day.  “Things have never been this bad!!” and “This is the end of America as we know it!!”.  These things are extremely helpful for getting through these times.  No matter how hard it gets, it’s important to remember that no one else in history has had it as tough as you.

About the author

Jesse Kelly

View all posts