It was a wonderful weekend for the magical mystery Trump apology tour. Circle the wagons! Let’s redefine “amnesty.” Poor Ann Coulter wishes she were a character in Farenheit 451 so she could properly burn her new book.
Jonah Goldberg mused:
Perhaps the only silver lining in any of this is watching Ann Coulter grapple with this calamity. If Tom Wolfe had written a novel where the Coulter character was defenestrated like this on the night of her book party at Breitbart HQ, the editor would have said, “C’mon, Tom.”
And yet Ann is sticking with her guy. I spent much of the last year writing how Trump was corrupting conservatism by forcing so many Republicans and conservatives to jettison their principles in order to get on the right side of a popular demagogue who would ultimately lead the GOP to catastrophic defeat at the hands of a corrupt and untalented Democratic candidate. There is a kind of pyrrhic schadenfreude, a tragic fremschämen, to watching the demagogues get corrupted too as their idol morphs into Jeb Bush before our eyes.
But the winner of the Pretzel Award for Incoherence in a News Program is Chris Christie speaking to Martha Raddatz on This Week:
RADDATZ: I’m joined now by Governor Chris Christie, a former presidential candidate and one-time Trump opponent, now the chair of Trump’s transition team.
And, Governor, let me start with this simple question: Will Donald Trump try to deport all undocumented workers or just those he refers to as the bad ones?
CHRISTIE: Listen, I think that he has been very clear on this. We’re not going to have amnesty . What we’re going to do is to get those who are breaking the law out of the country as quickly as possible to make sure then that you deal with people in a humane way. I think that’s what he’s been saying. He’s been saying that I think for as long as I’ve been listening to him of late, and that’s what he’s going to do.
RADDATZ: Well, dealing with them in a humane way, does that mean taking all of those 11 million undocumented workers, pushing them out of the country?
CHRISTIE: Well, I think what he has said is that people are not going to be eligible for legalization or citizenship unless they leave the country and get back in line. Now there’s going to be, you know, some decisions he’s going to have to make as president regarding those folks, and I think what he’s said let’s first get all of the bad actors out of the country. And I think that’s what’s really important.
And then he wants to look at this situation and deal with it in a humane way, and quite frankly, you know, I think this is the kind of thing people expect from a president of the United States, that they will approach these things thoughtfully and smartly and I’m confident that that’s exactly what a President Trump will do.
RADDATZ: Would you acknowledge then that that does sound like a softening from his original statements about getting everyone, 11 million undocumented workers, out of the country with a deportation force?
CHRISTIE: Listen, I think that the key to this, Martha, and the way to look at it, is that this is a guy who has been very consistent on no amnesty, no legalization, for folks who have been coming to the country illegally. And that has always been the underpinning of his policy along with the building of the wall on the United States-Mexican border. And those things have remained completely consistent.
I think what you expect of every candidate and ultimately of a president is to listen to the facts and to deal with things in a way that’s smart and direct. I’m confident that’s exactly what President Trump will do.
“Those who are breaking the law” are people who are here illegally. A former federal prosecutor should be able to discern that you can’t say you’re not deporting illegal aliens (“those who are breaking the law”) and claim it’s not amnesty at the same time.
Apparently, now Christie is relying on Donald Trump, who treats lawyers like a trip to Baskin Robbins for his 31 flavors, to determine which laws are “hard” and which ones are “soft.”
But the worst part is that Trump’s new immigration spin sounds a lot like what we’ve seen for the last 27 years. A lot of talk and then a lot of doing nothing at all.
You might think that none of this will matter come November 9 because there won’t be a President Trump. But it will matter, because the GOP will have Christie, Jeff Sessions, and all the rest of the crowd who backed Trump and lied for him with soiled laundry hanging out for all to see. They want to blame those of us who have consistently told the truth to cover their own lies.
We in the #NeverTrump camp are not the ones having to pretzel ourselves into complete incoherent nonsense.